Monday, August 06, 2001

Chubby Checker (Biography)has written a letter to the world in which he makes a dignified plea to the Nobel Committee to finally give it up and give him his prize. The key graf is this:

"Chubby Checker gave birth to aerobics.

He gave to music a movement that could not be found unless you were trained at some studio learning something other than dancing apart to the beat. It's easy. It's fun. The "Twist" [is] the only song, since time began, to become number one twice by the same artist. Oh yes, we're talking about the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. But lets face the truth. This is Nobel Prize Territory."
Mr Checker, you'll notice, talks about himself in the third person, imitating Henry Adams.

Well, let's compare Mr. Checker to Mr. Henry (the butcher) Kissinger, who did get a Nobel Prize, for peace no less.
On the one side you have The Twist, the invention of aerobics, and an eponymous brand of beef jerky, which you can buy from his site.

On the other side, you have the bombing of Cambodia, the Tilt towards Pakistan, the support of the Military regimes in Argentina, Indonesia, Chile, and Greece, the unnecessary extension of American military engagement in Vietnam for six years, and - oh, just throw in various slimy actions in Africa, culminating in the co-support, with the South African government of so-called Liberation fronts in Angola,and the propping up of such dictators as Mobuto in Zaire.

Okay. Judges, have you decided? Write down your answers on a piece of paper and give them to my lovely assistant. The clock is ticking away. One .... two.... three....
And now let's tally the vote, shall we. Silence, please ----
YES! IT IS UNANIMOUS! TAKE HENRY KISSINGER'S NOBEL PRIZE AND GIVE IT TO CHUBBY CHECKER! THE JUDGES HAVE SPOKEN.
Could there possibly be a better cause?
Contact me at - rgathman@aol.com. Let's make this cause a party.

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