It isn’t right! One expects certain courtesies. It is but a poor manse, but that is no reason to lower our standards. However, one can’t drill this message into the head of the valet. Il ne comprend rien. One really understand the phrase tete de bois in the face of this character.
For instance: one wants either to be in the playpen with the Ipad or one wants to be out of the playpen with the Ipad in easy reach. It is almost tiresomely simple. Yet once again one’s valet mixes it up. Thus, one finds oneself standing helplessly outside of the playpen staring at the Ipad inside the playpen. One has simply to raise one’s voice. It is all so dreadfully theatrical, but the valet sometimes seems to understand no other language.
Well… and then one is literally carried up the stairs. Is one consulted? No. At least, a consoling gesture, one’s Mickey Mouse is carried with one. Lately, in the afternoon, one so adores chats with M.M. A font of jollity! And what adventures that mouse has had. One sometimes says, mon chere, are you not exaggerating a bit? The dog’s name was actually Goofy?
Naturally, however, malentedus persist. The valet insists, for instance, in shutting the doors to the ever so fascinating bathroom. One had so looked forward to grabbing a few things – the contact case, the toothbrushes – and hurling them into the bathtub or toilet. But one’s valet once more gets in the way of these innocent, boyish pranks. One simply must expres one’s discontent the old fashioned way, a la Prusse, by for instance kicking the valet, or, when he picks one up, hurling oneself backwards in his arms. It is all very well that we have emancipated the serfs and have universal education, soi-disant, but it is hard to remember one’s liberalism when an object so undeservering of Enlightenment thwarts one’s every wish.And in regard to the simple pleasures elaborated above, he is hopeless.
However, one is not de la noblesse for nothing. Whim is forever the mark of true good breeding. One suddenly feels very fraternal towards one’s valet. He truly is doing his best as a retainer. So one caresses him, giggles with him, one rolls around with him and hides one’s face under the yell duck blanket – one of the valet’s favorite games. And then it is time for tea.